the true story behind the kayak
July 12, 2005 5:30 a.m.
My first morning in The Stalls.
Tricia wakes me up to go kayaking (first time for me), mind you I do not like cold water. But she insists that is very calm and it should be beautiful.
It is a cold morning I am wearing shorts a T-shirt and a heavy sweatshirt underneath my life jacket. Tricia is in the blue kayak and I am in the yellow one. She leads and I follow. We make it all the way out to Ned's Point. Water is very calm and flat, the sun is rising, it is chilly. Very quite in the bay, every one sleeping and we are the only two fools enjoying the scenery. Tricia decides to head back towards the Y where the kids took sailing classes. On the way there way past the Marina, I spot a rock and a couple of cormorant sunning themselves. I want to get closer to see them, and then decide to change my mind because I am afraid they will jump in the water and freak out Tricia who is ahead of me. That is when I very quietly a flip the kayak. Mind you that I did not scream or anything. Tricia did not know what was happening until she heard a small splash and a gasp (because the water was freezing), she turns herself around and I am gone! I get hold of my visor and sunglasses the kayak and the paddle. Tricia wants me to get back on the kayak right away, but when I ask her to hold my sunglasses and visor, she tells me "don't get near me!" .
I tell her I need to go under to flip the kayak around and she starts to tell not to go under the water. I am freezing!!!
She makes sure I don't loose the paddle and the kayak. So I am holding to the paddle the kayak which I have not been able to flip around. I suggest that I can swim to a beach nearby, but Tricia says "NO! It is private property! Then she asks me if I can swim to a dock (mind you that it was also private). So she leads the way in her kayak, laughing her head off, and saying, "Girl, better you than me, better you than me!", over and over. And I am following her swimming and dragging the overturned kayak and paddle and my heavy sweatshirt. Once in a while she will turn around and ask me if I was ok. I told her I already was building up a sweat! Mind you, that I felt like throwing the paddle at her as I was doing all this swimming and she was making all this ridiculous comments and laughing. It probably took about 10 minutes to get to the dock and little did we knew our "REAL" ordeal was going to begin. Because of low tide I could not reach the dock and climb (especially with my short arms and legs). I was able to put the paddle (that Tricia did not want to hold) on the dock and then I was able to turn the kayak around. With out any help on her part. She was like an acting supervisor and was keeping her distance from me, she thought if she will get close she will also end up in t he water. Anyway, I start to try to climb onto this dock and I keep scraping my legs on the rusty pilings, which are painted orange, and my legs end up covered in orange color. I cannot get myself hoisted up onto the dock. Tricia is of no help what so ever, as I am pushing my self out of the water with my very wet and heavy sweatshirt and still holding the kayak with one arm, Tricia starts laughing and I loose control and go right into the water, and this doesn't happen once, at least more than a dozen times. I try to climb and I fall right back down into the water. I beg her to shut up and not speak to me, and she cannot control her laughter. At one point, all you can hear is the two of us just cackling away in the quite morning. I feel I am climbing Mt. Everest, because at this point I am even sweating! I beg her to turn herself around in her kayak and not to look at me but she keeps on laughing uncontrollably. Some of Tricia's encouraging words were, "Girl, get your RonJon and get up on that dock!". She really was coming up with some crazy comments. I remember begging her to please be quiet so many times.I just want to be left alone and be able to think on how to get myself out of this situation. At one point, I tell her that she needs to go back to the house and get Brian to get the boat and come and get me, but she would not leave me. I finally decided to go the other side of the dock and attempt to get up on that side. A=2 0good hour had gone by at this point. I some how manage to get on top of the kayak instead of trying to get into the dock. Tricia is laughing so hard and making me laugh that it takes me fifteen minutes at least to move very slowly on top of the kayak because I know I will end up in the water again, since we were laughing so hard. I know I need to find my center of gravity and keep my balance it will take me at least another 20 minutes for me to be able to sit on top of the kayak. I was completely exhausted, mind you with plenty of scrapes and bruises on my legs from trying to climb onto the stupid dock. Finally we headed home not talking but laughing the whole way to our beach, to a very quiet and sleepy house. And breaking the silence with our continuous laughter. The time was after 7:30 a.m.
Welcome to the Cape!
trish,
I think your ashes should be placed in a kayak and flipped into the bay
near the rock and the PIER!
and your epitaph should read....
and your epitaph should read....
Better you than me!
Addy Jean
Addy Jean
